Archive for the 'Humor' Category

OneScrappyMom

Today was the kids birthday party. They had a blast. There was somewhere around 30 kids there. I wasn’t really counting and didn’t care to know the exact number. All I know was it was LOUD. We had a party at the roller rink here in town. It’s only open for parties on Sunday so we had the entire thing! What a good time the kids AND ADULTS had. They all skated and dance/skated like it was 1999!! Literally!! Some of the parents, our friends and I had gone there as children to skate. It used to be open on Wednesday nights, Friday nights, Saturday nights and Sunday nights. Now it is only open for parties and family skate two times a month. It is sad that it is gone now. But the original owner passed away and through the years we’ve (as in people/society) gotten more busy and more involved with our kids and grandparents these days work, sometimes both parents work there is just no one to tend to it full time anymore. The kids were of course stumbling some with skating, but some of the adults were on their behinds too. They are going to have some sore legs and back sides tomorrow. Unfortunately no hemorrhoids treatment will relieve THAT pain!! LOL Anyhow… The kids cake was a 2 tier candy coated fun cake!! Covered in fondant frosting that was lifted off (for lack of better words fondant is chewy and nasty tasting). So the layer on fondant was able to come right off and the butter cream was underneath. It was SOOOO amazingly yummy. The top tier was white cake with vanilla frosting, the bottom tier was marble cake with chocolate frosting! I had to cut the pieces HUGE to get most of the cake gone because I always go elaborate on the cake. I love HUGE BEAUTIFUL cakes!! My cake is always the highlight of my party and today was NO exception! Because my children are born 4 days shy of 3 years apart we do their parties together and have one nice huge cake. They got a ton of presents and gift cards. Tomorrow they want to go shopping, but I have no idea if I am up for that adventure. Right now I am enjoying and learning about my MAC. It did arrive, however I haven’t had much time to play on it. This is my FIRST post from the MAC. I’ve decided NOT to name this one yet. In the past I named my laptops… I had “Mean Green” which was my first Dell laptop, and then I got “Pinkie” {and me being the brain… it was Pinkie & the Brain… Get it?!?! HAHA!! I kill myself with humor} my second Dell laptop. I HATE Dell and I wanted to try a MAC. So I ordered it. I love it. So far.

Of course with the MAC I am having a HUGE learning curve. I need to seriously learn so much. It’s sometimes frustrating and I just want to turn Pinkie back on and be done. I am not sure who all of my readers is/are MAC users so I will just tell you a few of my issues {briefly} and if anyone has any tips/tricks I would be HAPPY to hear them.

1. The plug SUCKS! The wall part is HUGE and hates staying in the outlet and the part that plugs into the laptop itself is, well crap-tastic!! It’s magnetic and pretty much falls out as soon as you touch it. *sigh* Apple WHY? You have the most amazing things, but do *something* crap-tastic to it. The iPhone has a 12″ cord! It sucks too!!

2. The internet is VERY laggy. I tried Safari a few times and I thought maybe it was that. So I downloaded Firefox. Still no go. It’s laggy and seems like it doesn’t load anywhere NEAR as fast as Firefox did on Pinkie.

3. It’s downloading ALL my Gmail. Even Gmail that has long since been deleted. All the SPAM too. ANNOYING!!

4. The dock… *sigh* It’s either always there or “invisible”. I want it to stay, but under my windows. It doesn’t. When I maximize a window the dock is at the bottom and I lose part of my “expanded” screen size.

5. The mouse… *sigh* I obviously am used to a PC mouse and my mouse is working on the MAC, but it seems laggy. If I get a MAC mouse is this going to happen? Is it because it’s a Universal mouse? I don’t like and never liked using the touchpad on laptops.

6. Navigation… Where’s my stuff? I haven’t even TRIED to add anything like Photoshop to it yet. I’m confused as to wear my documents and things are or go… so I haven’t really done anything more then install Yahoo Messenger and MSN Messenger. And by the way… Is iChat different or does iChat use my AIM contacts? How confusing is that?!? The window says AIM buddy list, but I had to sign up for a mac.com address to use it???

7. Color… The screen color seems ummm OFF to me!?? I am afraid to edit photos on it because I am afraid the colors aren’t right. How can this be? Pinkie had a true color screen so this just seems a little more yellow-ish maybe to me?

I think I get a one on one with Apple to help learn some things. I am pretty sure it was with my purchase, but I can’t remember. Plus we don’t have an APPLE store in my city… We have authorized agents? Wonder if that works the same way? At this point, I do like the MAC, but I am frustrated and having a huge learning curve stumble. I wish I knew someone that had a MAC, was in my area, that could sit with me!! I am open to ideas, advise, tips, tricks!! I know some of my readers have got to know what I mean!!

Until tomorrow bloggers…

OneScrappyMom

I just want to scream at the top of my lungs right now!! For the last 2 days I’ve been stalking and refreshing the FedEx site. What is the best arthritis treatment? I need it now!! I see my MAC is on the delivery truck and I’ve been staring out the window all day. Finally I spot the truck, T_H_E truck! I’ve watched the FedEx man drive up and down my street for the last half hour. He is not noticing that he is PASSING my house and apparently can’t read house numbers. I am so annoyed. I’ve called FedEx and they are issuing a dispatch message to the driver. He’s got my special package and I want it!! Seriously, what’s so hard about looking at the OTHER side of the road for the house!!

OneScrappyMom

I am usually able to suffer through almost anything, I mean, I did birth 2 children and I have a husband, that has to count for something right?! Well this week started off with the most intolerable migraine I’ve ever had. I know I probably say that every time, but this time I was seeing spots. It felt like there was a 5″ switchblade sticking out of the side of my head. For the record, I have no idea what that really feels like, but I am SURE it feels like this headache did. I wanted to crawl into the fetal position and cry, except that crying made noise, and noise made it worse. The sound of swallowing a pill was far too much. I have a prescription medication that I take for migraines, so even though I didn’t want to hear the noise of me swallowing, I took one. A few hours later another, a few hours later yet another. My DR told me I could repeat this up to three times so I really thought nothing of it. However, it just so happens that the nurse from the DR’s office called me to give me some test results shortly after taking the 3rd one. As I heard my blackberry vibrating on the night stand, oh yeah it’s 1:00pm and I am still not out of bed yet, I cringed. WHO in the world would call someone with a migraine? I mean I updated my facebook and twitter and you are still calling me? Seriously? Who is the asshole on the other end? I reach over, can’t look at the caller ID because the light of the phone drives me insane (more then I already am) when I have a migraine, so I fumble with buttons until I hear

“Hello, Bobbie?”

“Yes…..”

“This is Jane, the nurse at the DR’s office. I am calling with your test results.”

“Can you call back tomorrow?”

“Ah. Sure?”

“Thank you.”

“Is something wrong?”

“Well I’ve had a migraine since 2am yesterday and I think I am dying. I’ve taken my RX three times now.”

“OH DEAR! YOU CAN’T TAKE IT THAT MUCH.”

“First, DR said I could. Second, if you scream like that again I will disconnect you.”

“I’m sorry. I am going to check with the DR. I will call you right back.”

“Okay. Bye”

“Bye.”

Then she had me scared so I braved the screen of my blackberry rather then the laptop and looked up the RX online. Managing through all the click here and click there’s I found a little information on the medicine and I (and the DR) was right. I was within the “safe” amount. So I set the phone on the night stand rolled over and again, was trying to cry, except that hurt. The pillow hurt, who the hell replaced my pillows with cement? Honestly?! Who is out to get me? I dose off. Suddenly I hear the vibration of my blackberry on the night stand. This person, why this person is going to get it.

“HELLO.” (son of a nickel that hurt my head more then I can imagine)

“Bobbie, this is Jane calling back.”

“Yes.”

“DR doesn’t want you to take anymore of the RX, he’s calling you in Tylenol #3 and would like you to use them.”

“Um okay.”

“You need to take no more of the RX for 24 hours. Do you understand?”

“I have a migraine, I am not retarded. Yes I understand.”

“What pharmacy do you use?”

“Walgreens on Mason.”

“Okay I will send this over now.”

“Thank you. Bye.”

So let me get this straight… now I get to be out of it and still have a headache? Maybe I will catch a buzz or something for a minute or so and be happy, for just a second! I text hubby to get the medicine on his way home. Then toss my blackberry across the room. I can’t bear that vibration noise or one more phone call. Hubby picks up the RX on his way home from the gym. He gets home, I dose up and sleep the rest of the day. I woke up today with a MILD headache, but it felt the like switchblade was gone. So that was a good thing. I took some more Tylenol #3 and napped until 10:30am. Headache gone. So long Mr Migraine. Don’t come back! I mean it, your not welcome here anymore. Seriously!

Now to call Jane, apologize and also find out exactly how I should handle this in the future. Oh and I already apologized to my beloved blackberry for throwing her across the room, she’s forgiven me. We’ve kissed and made up and all is well in the land of Berry.

OneScrappyMom

Often I sit here and think to myself: What should I blog about today? What is the sole purpose of my blog? What is the main theme of my blog? Do I have to have any of those things? Does anyone give a rip? Do I give a rip?

When I first started this blog in 2006 (I’ve removed a lot of my archived posts for various reasons) I was a huge scrapbooker. It was the reason for the domain name, however, as I grew away from scrapbooking daily, the name just stuck with me and I love it so it remained. I haven’t scrapbooked in the better part of a year. I miss it, I will begin again SOON! Its something I love and something I miss and I want those memories on paper for years to come. My kids will appreciate them when they are older too.

I’ve come to realize that my blog is my personal public space. Just as I am intrigued to read others, they are intrigued to read mine. Whatever may or may not fascinate my readers is what makes this blog unique. This blog is MY life, unedited! All of the ups, downs, ins, outs of parenting, photography, marriage, weight loss, life, and whatever else I want to spew are all here. It’s my little hodge-podge! Perhaps that is the scrapbooker in me coming through! So if I feel like talking about outdoor cushions for the patio set, the dogs latest adventure, what child made the honor roll, what disaster happened in our home, I will. I have no boundaries, because this is my life… unedited!

Blogged from my Blackberry