A few weeks ago I shared with you that I was teaming up with U by Kotex Tween as an ambassador and would be walking through several parts of having this discussion with your tween daughter. It’s time to move into the phase of having this discussion with your daughter. I originally thought I would interview my daughter AFTER we had the discussion and see what she had learned. This quickly became a reality to me that not only might she be uncomfortable, but I wouldn’t have given her ample time to process everything we had discussed. For me it’s important that this discussion goes smooth and she takes away as much as she can. I also want her to feel open to asking any questions she might have. It’s important to me that I have a discussion with my daughter prior to the process happening, which I feel could scare or embarrass her. This is a discussion that I feel should be just between you and your daughter. Grab your favorite drink and maybe a snack. Make the moment comfortable, just like you would if you were talking to them about any other sensitive subject. For this this ment sending hubby out with our son to a movie. This gave us the time alone to talk about things.
As the discussion began, I explained to my daughter that this is a normal part of life and it shouldn’t scare her. She would experience changes to her body and this would be one. I actually thought the conversation would go off in another direction and that there would be a lot of “dead air” time, but to my surprise, my daughter was very interactive. She asked questions. I answered. I also had some products from U by Kotex Tween with me to help. I showed things to her and we opened them and discussed things. This I felt was important because truthfully if her first time happens away from home (ie school) she needs to know how to use the products I am providing her with. If she doesn’t know how to work the products or how they adheres to her clothing, etc, this could bring on a bout of anxiety and/or embarrassment for her. Ultimately, I am trying to avoid this, even though some of it will still happen because that’s natural. I want to eliminate what I can. The talk was very casual. It went very well. I did show my daughter the U by Kotex Tween resource page, which helped us as we talked. There are videos and a wealth of information that answered some things neither my daughter or I had thought of during the discussion. U by Kotex Tween also has a wonderful page for parents getting ready to have these talks and topics you may wish to discuss.
Since this is a serious discussion that will help your daughter on her journey, I do recommend that you pick a date, be prepared and don’t let your own uncomfort shine through. My daughter could tell that I was completely at ease and even though she wasn’t in the beginning, she certainly was by the end. She asked questions and took over “leading” the conversation. The big thing for me was making sure she had what she needed, in both information and products. I learned more about my period from my friends then I did my mom. As a result, there was a lot of misinformation I had, which truthfully made me much more uncomfortable then I would have been if there was a true discussion. My mom was more casual and asked questions as they arose, not really a sit down discussion.
Some girls get their period as young as 8 years old! It’s time to prepare your daughter or tween in your life. Start the conversation with age appropriate talk and work your way up. Don’t be afraid to show them the products and explain what they do. My daughter has a special little make up case that we purchased to put in her back pack that she can have discretely, which will help her if she gets her period during school or a sleepover.
FTC Disclosure: I wrote this post while participating in a campaign by Mom Central Consulting on behalf of U By Kotex Tween and received a promotional item to thank me for my time. All views and opinions with regard to the products or company itself are my own and were not influenced, nor reviewed, by the company prior to posting.